Manolo for the Beauty

The Oscars red carpet 2011 was actually fairly boring, makeup-wise. So, I’m going to be focusing mostly on hair. 

And because I’m in a bad mood, completely random potshots at anybody and everybody! No one is spared! Not even the famous elderly!

Hailee Steinfeld is a-freaking-dorable. Love the hair.

Bow down to your pink overlord.  The details on the dress were incredible.

Not a fan of the dress, and I find her hair extremely aging.

I thought her hair was perfect.  Fun but still polished.

Thank you Lord, for letting Sharon Stone bring teh cray-cray.

Penelope Cruz has Javier Bardem, a new son, and fantastic hair? Life.  It is not fair.

Armie Hammer (SRSLY?) and Elizabeth Chambers: couple voted Most Likely to Annoy the Crap Out of You. Kids, you would do well to emulate Penelope and Javier.

More snark after the jump.

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I simply don’t have the time or the energy to keep up with color on my hands.

I have a toddler, and I think I rival a doctor for the amount of times a day I wash my hands. The wear and tear on my nails and skin is pretty intense, and I have a hard enough time keeping my hands hydrated, much less making sure a manicure looked perfect. I would have to do the whole base coat/top coat thing, and most days I feel lucky I got to take a shower, much less futz around with ten nails and color that is guaranteed to wear off.

Because if there is one thing I hate, and I know it was trendy for a while, it’s chipped color on my nails. Sadly, that trend is no longer. Although supposedly this is a new polish trend, one that I could definitely get behind. Chipped color drives me nuts, and when it happens, I can’t stop looking at it. Not being able to fix it immediately would trigger an OCD reaction, and it would just be more trouble than it was worth.

I’ve never even had a professional manicure, for goodness sakes. I think I am one of the few left in North America. I have the feeling I belong in a museum or something. My placard would read “Manicurus Avoidus, somehow managed to never visit a nail salon in her life, despite there being one on practically every corner in 21st Century America.”

But color on my toes?

Different story entirely.

Maybe because my feet are farther away and I can’t see the chips as well?

Hmmm, interesting…

On a trip to Target not too long ago, I picked up Pixi’s Endless Silky Eye Pen in Deep Plum.  I have greenish-blue eyes, and I was getting tired of black eyeliner.  I’ve used plum eyeliner with great success before, and decided to try it again.  I had read no reviews about the Silky Eye Pen, but it was sheer chance that I chose it out of all the brands in the store.  Oh, and the fact that not too many brands make a plum-colored eyeliner had a lot to do with it as well. 

Later that week, I went to Sephora, and in the heady rush of being in my favorite store, I bought another plum eyeliner, Aqua Eyes 4L, this time from MUFE .  One of the Sephora ladies pointed me to it, and told me I wouldn’t be disappointed. 

Dun, dun, dun, foreshadowing!

Anyhoo, I decided to pit Pixi versus MUFE in an eye-to-eye fight.  Winner would be the one who 1) was easier to apply 2)  had the best color and 3) stayed the longest.  Pixi went on the left eye, MUFE on the right. Both are touted as long-lasting and waterproof.

Pixi went on like buttah.  Impressive.  It has a very silky (hence the name, I’m guessing) texture and it truly did glide.

MUFE went on well, but not as nicely as the Pixi, and I had to go over my eyelid twice because it snagged a bit.  MUFE definitely had a more pencil-like texture.

Point to Pixi.

Pixi had a deep, rich plum color that was highly pigmented.  It was a nice, dark purple.

MUFE’s plum was lighter, and didn’t seem to be as pigmented to my untrained eyes. For whatever reason, it seemed more on the brown side than the purple side, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but not what I was looking for.

Another point to Pixi.

You’re dying to find out which one lasted longer, right?  Because you’re thinking, no way could MUFE lose every category!

MUFE did not last nearly as well as the Pixi, which looked pretty much the same at the end of the day as when I had first applied it.

Pixi for the win!

I went into this thinking that for sure MUFE was going to kick some major Pixi butt, however, that was clearly not the case.

Pixi isn’t exactly cheap at only three dollars less than the MUFE, but I would buy it even if it was more expensive.

Shocking, isn’t it?

The lovely and superfantastic Libby asks:

 What is the best way to go about cleaning a hair brush?  I have long, curly hair and live in the swamps of tidewater Virginia, so I have to use product or risk looking like an ad for a bad 80’s perm. That usually means that gunk gets in my brush.  My usual solution is just to replace said brush when it gets gungy-looking, but there have been some nice brushes I’ve lost that way.

Libby, how you clean your hairbrushes depends on what kind of brushes you have. 

For your fairly cheap, sturdy plastic brushes, I simply lift all the excess hair out using either a comb or my fingers (depending on how much hair there is)  and throw them in the top rack of the dishwasher. I do the same for basic combs.  Eschew the heated dry option or it’s a good bet they will melt. 

Recommendations for how often you clean your brushes range from every day to once a month.  I think it varies, depending on how heavy your product usage is.  And really, just be aware of what’s building up on the brush and be proactive about getting it off in a timely manner, else you will be transferring everything from gunked-up product to dust right back onto your hair.  Blech.

But if you’ve got more expensive brushes, including those with nylon or natural bristles as well as wooden handles (such as the Cadillac of hairbrushes, the Mason Pearson) you’ve got a bit more work to do.  I find that the method below works on pretty much all hair brushes, regardless of type.  There are some who like to dip the brush into water, but my thinking is that the least amount of  exposure to water leads to a brush that lasts longer.  The rule should be: The More Expensive the Brush = Use the Least Amount of Water Possible.  That way, you can really get your money’s worth.  It’s completely possible for quality hair brushes, taken care of properly, to last a decade or more.

A good rule of thumb is to dry clean your brushes often, running  a narrow toothbrush (the easiest and cheapest tool) gently along the bristles horizontally,vertically, and diagonally along the bristles to dislodge dust and such.

However, when you notice some build-up, nothing but a good wet-washing will suffice.

1. Remove all excess hair, using a wide toothed comb at the base and lifting up hair and dirt as you move around the brush. 

2. Throw that crap away.

3. Run some lukewarm water, never hot.  Use a small amount of shampoo to make a soapy lather in the sink.

4. Dip the toothbrush, not your hair brush, into the soapy water.

5. Hold the hair brush so that the bristles are facing down, not the handle.

5. Gently run the toothbrush up and down the bristles, as well as diagonally.  Scrub the pad gently if you notice buildup on the pad as well.

6. Dip the toothbrush in some clean water and run it up and down the brush in the same manner in order to rinse off the soap.  Repeat as often as needed until it appears soap is gone.

7. Shake off any excess water.

7. Air-dry on a towel with the pad facing downward for the best results and the least amount of damage to the bristles.

The Beauty Poll on a Tuesday? Why not? I don’t think I could bear to go two weeks in a row without running a new poll. 

Yes, I’m that nosy.

The last poll wanted to know if you would still buy products from a company who had an employee outburst that doesn’t jive with your personal belief system.  45% of you said it depended on how influential that employee was within the company, although I think it is safe to assume that the person is fairly high-profile.  I mean, I don’t see a newspaper interviewing the junior marketing guy very often.  Although Jezebella had an interesting distinction, commenting,  “More so than how influential the person is, I would consider what the company’s response was to the person’s bad behavior.” Excellent point. 37% of you stated you would no longer buy from the company, and 16% said they would still buy the product.

I asked the poll question in direct response to something the lovely Queen of Sheba pointed out to me after I posted about Guerlain lipstick, which is what I linked to in the original poll post.  I was disgusted by what Mr. Guerlain had stated in his interview, but that didn’t stop me from buying Guerlain products.  As discussed in the comments section, Guerlain is no longer a family-run business and is run by mega-corp LVMH.  I consider the Guerlains to be no longer associated with the company, and thus, reasoned that I wasn’t acting against my principles by buying their product.  Or, maybe I’m just fooling myself. 

As for today, I’m going to lean toward a more light-hearted subject.  I got so many interesting responses on my anti-waxing post, that I felt I needed to hear from all of you about the very important subject of how you personally choose to tend your lady-garden.  Yes, yes, it is definitely veering into TMI, but what is a little TMI amongst friends?  And besides, this is the internets!  Nobody will know how you voted! I get zero data on the votes, just the total.

Well, actually there was not a whole lot of diversity of hairstyles on the runway for the Fall 2011 collections at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week in New York.  For a nation that is still in the economic doldrums, I suppose that the “severe” look is apropos.  I know that fall hair is usually more subdued, but this is bordering on “coma.”

You’ve got your slick look with either a ponytail or bun:

Calvin Klein Fall 2011

Vera Wang Fall 2011

Then, playing on that, you’ve got either a middle part for the very brave:

Jason Wu Fall 2011

Michael Kors Fall 2011

Ralph Lauren Fall 2011

J. Mendel Fall 2011

Or if you like to live on the wild side, a side part:

Carolina Herrera Fall 2011

The only ones who played it different were:

Rodarte Fall 2011

Y-3 Fall 2011

I’m not sure anyone over 25 can rock the long, loose plaits. 

I’m suddenly feeling sleepy.  And possibly depressed. You?

It was sometime in the late 1970’s.

I was a young girl who was forbidden by my parents to wear makeup.  Except for Halloween, when I would be a Gypsy, as politically incorrect as that was, and get to wear blue eyeshadow and blush and lots of necklaces.

But to a lassie such as myself, one night a year just wasn’t good enough.  I yearned for cosmetics, but my parents and their iron fist (not to mention the Catholic nuns who would certainly inform my parents if I showed up at school looking like a harlot with makeup on) kept me from them.

So in a distant second place finish, I was allowed to wear Rachel Perry Lip Lover.  Oh, it didn’t color your lips, but it did have a wonderful texture, lasted for ages, and have I mentioned the smell? So many different to choose from, all of them great.  My favorite was the cantaloupe, and it was heady stuff indeed.  It was the kind of lip balm where you would deliberately pucker your lips under your nose all day in order to get the full scent, rather than take a chance that at whatever wafted randomly.

It was all natural and therefore parent-approved, but I didn’t even care.  The smell was what kept me coming back for more.

I thought about Lip Lover the other week, and decided to go online and see if it was even being made lo these thirty or so years later.

Alack and alas!  It seems I am too late.

Discontinued!  And only last year!

Damn.  I hate it when that happens.

Not too long ago, the New York times ran an article that said perms are back with a vengeance, baby.

Except they’ve been saying that since 2008.

And it still hasn’t happened.  I come in contact with more than my fair share of trendy, hip women and not one of them has a perm. 

It’s because we are scarred.

How could we not be?

I was a willing victim of the spiral perm in the late 80’s/early 90’s and I will never forget having to sit there, holding a strip of cotton in a death grip against my forehead, desperately hoping that the steaming, stinky perm solution wouldn’t run down my face and burn me. 

God, it was awful.

I can still smell it to this day.

But my hair has always been very straight and at the time, curls were where it was at. 

Supposedly the “new” perm is a softer, gentler sort of perm that leaves your hair looking more after-the-beach than anything else.

Call me cynical, but it seems that the looser the initial curl, the more quickly it will fall out?  That was why everybody loved those spirals because damn, it took months for that stuff to relax.  You felt like you were getting your money’s worth.  But I do remember it being hell to grow it out when I decided I was done with the permed look.

What say you? Are perms back or are they just trying to convince us they are?

You know, there’s something to be said for a spouse who knows you really, really well.

We’ve been a couple for coming up on 20 years, married for almost ten.  So the man knows better than to get me flowers on Valentine’s Day.  Hell no, he took me to Sephora and pretty much told me to get whatever I want.  The man certainly knows how to make me swoon.

I’ll have some posts up on what I bought later on, but I wanted to share a pet peeve that I was reminded of when browsing the displays at Sephora.

We can explode protons, but we cannot figure out how to truly represent the color of makeup?  I’m talking specifically about those horrid plastic things on the end of lipstick testers that purportedly tell you what the color is supposed to be.  Eight times out of ten though, the color looks pretty much nothing like the color representation.  And a lot of the time, the lip pencil and eye pencil ones aren’t any better.

Which kind of sucks, because then you know that you can’t really discount what it looks like on the tester and you have to try it out on your hand.  I still am not comfortable trying the stuff on my lips or my eyes, no matter how many times they wipe it and tell me it is perfectly sanitary.  

I definitely have fun trying out colors, but it would be nice to know that the color sample I’m looking at is fairly accurate. 

Is that too much to ask?

Happy Valentine’s Day!  Unless you hate Valentine’s Day, and if so, then Valentine’s Day sucks!

I’m all about keeping you happy.

Today I’m going to postpone the normal Monday Beauty Poll (as fascinating as it was) in favor of some of the wackness that always comes to the Grammy’s red carpet.  I think that the Grammys are by far the loosest red carpet of the awards season, and many of the performers are more than happy to bring teh crazy.

Not an overly crazy red carpet this year in beauty, but there are always, er, colorful looks to discuss.

It’s always good to have a visual reminder of why blue shadow right up to the brow should stay in the 1970’s. Thank you, Adrienne Lau, for being this year’s sacrificial lamb.  I DO NOT want to talk about the Boob Canyon.

Does someone like Cyndi get an automatic pass no matter what?  Because her hair reminds me of this.  I’m pretty sure that’s a bad thing.

It always baffles me to see multi-millionaires with horrific, ratty-ass hair extensions.

Eva, we can see the white under your eyes, and we don’t want to. I read somewhere that her uber-white undereye thing was due to HD makeup, but nobody else looks like that. Fire your artist, hon.

When M.A.C. creates a lipstick in your name, I’m guessing you get a lifetime supply.  I’m prepared to see Nicki Minaj with this lipstick for the next ten years.

More crabbiness after the jump…

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